"Got teens? You lucky dogs.
Spend time with them; enjoy them; listen to them; and love them.
They are the most incredible people, these emerging adults,
and they can become the best friends you'll ever have."
~Diana Waring, Reaping the Harvest. The Bounty of Abundant-Life Homeschooling~
To join the Thursday Talkin' About Teenagers "meme," just scroll down to the bottom of the post for the linking system.
To join the Weekly Wrapup meme, visit Carol's blog at Three Little Ladies , and link us all to your post! Be sure to leave a comment here so I can visit your blog, too!
(Because this post was so detailed, I'm letting it do "dual duty" this week!)
I could have titled this one a couple of ways, the alternate being "Shining Light Into Darkness," but the "Coping" title was the best description. Just a warning...this one's long. We've had quite a last couple of weeks.
Bryan and Nathan are taking an English Composition class at our local community college this year, in order to kill two birds with one stone...that would be, to earn "dual credit" for the class. They will, upon completing the class (assuming they pass it, as well!), earn one year of high school English credit, plus 3 college credits. Not a bad deal.
The professor had a play on her list of texts that students needed to purchase. The booklet was listed as "on order" for the first month of class, and it wasn't even available from Amazon. I was a bit concerned, given the nature of much of theater these days, so I Googled the play title and author, and started to read reviews. Although it would not have been anything I would have chosen for the boys to use as part of an English class, it didn't seem too "untoward," so we discussed what the play seemed to be about, and began to come up with some Biblical responses to the "situation" that they might be able to, without "preaching" (a big no-no!), include in an opinion piece about the play...again, going by the reviews of the plot we read online in 3 places.
They've been doing well in this class, and like the teacher. I like that she's using a really interesting (and quite new to me) way to teach writing...something that I have been struggling to do with my sons. (Can you believe it? I know how to write...I just don't seem to be able to teach someone else to do it successfully!) So, once the booklets finally came in, we bought 2 copies of the play and I settled in to read the little thing cover to cover.
Oh...
my...
gosh.
Oh my gosh...oh my gosh...oh my gosh...oh my gosh. You know, I didn't grow up a Christian. I began to learn about following Jesus in my college years, and began doing it myself in my adult years. I'm a nurse, so not much "embarasses" me at this stage of my life. You know what I mean? But this play...
Oh...
my...
gosh.
NEVER have I seen so much unnecessary and inappropriate vulgarity written into a play. Maybe I'm not too well-versed in theater anymore. But I was disgusted by this. Bryan and Nathan had taken a look at the first few pages of the booklet, and closed it up and said, "Mom, um...this is pretty bad." Thank God they didn't read much further...what they read was just heavy duty swear words. They hadn't gotten to the really vulgar parts.
OK, well, we'll get a couple bottles of heavy-duty White-Out (liquid paper) and I'll start painting these books to make them readable! "Mom, um...there's still a problem. The professor says we have to go and see the play. It's required." Hmmm. Now what? We started to pray.
The next week, once everyone had gotten a copy of the book, the professor instructed them to read the entire play (it's not that long) by the end of the week. And, in all her "wisdom" (yes, I'm being a little bit sarcastic) to make sure they got started on that assignment, she had the students begin reading the play in class, out loud. She told them that they could choose to leave any curse-words out, if they preferred to. She also said that this would be the one and only time that they were allowed to use such language in her classroom. UGH.
I asked the boys, whose books had by that time already been altered by the White-Out brush, if anyone else in the class had left the swearing out when it was their turn to read aloud. "No, no one else did." (I do want to mention that there is a very sweet Christian young lady, a family friend of ours, in the class with my boys. Her part, PTL, didn't happen to include any profanity, so she had no "editing" to do! I know that she absolutely would have, had it come to that.)
I am grateful for 2 things here. First of all, that the in-class-reading stopped before it got to the portions of this disgusting play that I would have been really angry about...to the point of writing to the college board and to the newspapers to ask if this is really what they feel is part and parcel of an English Comp. class at our Community College. Second, and more importantly, that my boys refused to engage in that kind of language, and made their stand.
But it's gone further than just that. Remember, this professor is requiring her students to see the play. I can't use "White-Out" on an actor's mouth. After watching it, they'll be writing 2 papers about it...one, a critique of the performance, the other more of an "analysis" type paper. We had several choices:
- Tell the professor that the play is unacceptable because of the over-the top vulgarity, and that we simply will not be attending it, and accept the consequences (loss of "points" toward the grade, or possible a zero for the assignment...since this is college, whatever they get goes on the permanent transcript).
- Tell the professor that the play is unacceptable because of the over-the top vulgarity, and withdraw from the class.
I call these responses, "cursing the darkness."
I call this response, "compromise on what we hold to be truth and value."
I call this response reasonable and worth trying! Actually, our friend had already spoken with the professor, and asked if she could use the Shakespearian play, "As You Like It," which is being performed later in March at another small college in town. The professor was familiar with it, so she agreed since she could just write an alternate quiz for this play...a quiz which was being given to the class on Monday. This was Friday. To keep up with the class, she would have 2 days to read the play, which, in written form, is 200 pages long. Then, since the Shakespeare play wasn't being performed until mid-March, she will be working "out of synch" with the class syllabus, and will basically be on her own doing the March assignments (book reports and something else) while the class is on theater, and then she'll be doing the theater assignments while the class is onto new stuff.
Bryan and Nathan had NO HOPE of getting it done. Their other class load was too heavy, and for Bryan, who is wildly dyslexic, 200 pages of Shakespeare in 2 days is simply a "no go." Being "on their own" and out of synch with the class teaching schedule was not good for them. They need the instruction, it's why we enrolled them in the class to begin with! They emailed their professor, and told her that they had deeply held convictions which made the viewing of this play a great difficulty for them. They told her how much they enjoyed her teaching style, and how much they were learning about writing, and would it be possible for them to take the quiz on her selected play along with the class (they could read through it, since I'd edited it), but then do their papers about the classic French play, "Cerano de Bergerac."
We have the play in written form from our BJU Press English Lit textbook, and they'd already read it once with that course last year in our homeschool high school. We know, because we've seen it, that we could rent a video of a live stage production of Cyrano from our library. They told her that they've been to theatrical performances before, and understand the extra depth you get from seeing a play performed live, and that they would be viewing a live performance of Cyrano on tape. They could stay with her teaching about critiquing a play, and the whole thing would work out time-wise since they could view the taped performance anytime, unlike the Shakespeare play which won't be viewed until the class is finished with the entire section. We thought for sure she'd say "yes," as it was such a good solution!
She said "no." They could do the play with the rest of the class, or they could do Shakespeare.
Wow. More praying. All along, the guys were telling me that they didn't want to drop the class. I didn't want to get into a big fight with the professor (we wouldn't win), especially since we are there "by permission" as high school students. I also didn't want an "F" on their transcripts as their first grade in college! There had to be a way out of this...
When my friend, Diana Waring, was here for a brief visit a couple weeks ago, we had a wonderful day of conversation about many things, one of which was about how our young adults can cope with the darkness of the world in which they live. And not only how they can cope, but when and why they should cope. I won't get into it all here this week as this post is already way too long for a Thursday TAT! But some of the things we discussed really played into our decision.
We don't want to just curse the darkness. We want to be salt and light. We want to be a witness to this professor, and to the other young adults in the class, some of whom, we've learned, are also disturbed by parts of the play, but don't know what or how to do anything about it other than to just drift along and feel disturbed. But we will NOT compromise on the Scriptural admonitions regarding what we allow our eyes to see, our ears to hear, and our hearts to dwell upon, even for 45 minutes in a college theater.
You know what they came up with?
I-pods! Earbuds! Go to the play,. with their copies of the text of the play in hand, that have been "sanitized" of the vulgarity (sometimes 1/2 the page is whited-out...and it doesn't impact the understanding of the story, just removes the "verbal assault" from it)...I'm going along, too. I've already read the thing. Our tickets are on the aisle in the far back corner of the theater, right by the exit. Since we are going on a Thursday evening, the ticket office told me that the theater will not be full, and we'll likely be fairly alone up there. The boys have classical music downloaded to their I-pods, and will put their earbuds in when the play begins, but with the volume off. I have their books marked with "cues" of when we're a page away from the really vulgar parts. When they see that marking, the volume goes up on the I-pod until they cannot hear the actors, and they read along in their play books with their clip on reading lights or pen lights, with me letting them know roughly where we are. They can watch the stage (there won't be anything visually unacceptable....it's all verbal), and when the garbage part is over, I'll give them a little hand signal, and the volume gets turned down. This will repeat several times throughout the play.
I thought it was brilliant!!! Of course, they have not and will not share this little plan with their professor. But they are looking forward to, in a winsome manner, writing their papers in such a way that will shine the light of Christ into the darkness of man. We know that, as they grow older and eventually go out into the world on their own as adults, the darkness will not be decreasing. This is training time for the war that faces them out there. They are learning how to engage the culture of darkness with the love and promise of Jesus Christ, which they have within them. Not everyone will like them for it.
I love them for it.
Join Us Each Thursday! Here's How:
Simply write a positive post about something (or things) that your homeschooling teenager has done which impressed you this week. Keep it focused on good/encouraging/growth-maturity-related things you've observed about them; lessons they've learned, or that you've learned through them.
Link back to me (Lori @ Plans4You) in your post somewhere, so your readers will know where to go to join Thursday TAT. If you'd like the link-button to put on your blog and/or at the top of your post, you can get it by clicking HERE.
Sign the Mister Linky below.
Be sure to leave me a comment, and then visit the other participant's blogs, and comment there, as well!
